Getting Back Together — How to Deal With Old Feelings

September 7, 2012 6:07 am

Getting Back Together — How to Deal With Old Feelings

If you have broken up with your ex, but things are beginning to feel more normal now, you probably have some questions about getting back together. Many couples who get back together sort of feel like they are having their first date all over again. Things may be awkward, especially if there are unanswered questions on the table.

While it is important to sort out past problems in the relationship, you probably don’t want to discuss anything too heavy when you first start dating again. Consider it a clean slate for now, even though these important issues are not gone forever.

When the timing is right, you can discuss these past issues so they do not rise up again in an ugly fashion. In fact, waiting too long can mean that these same issues ruin your relationship again! That’s why it is an important balancing act. On the other hand, discussing things too early can wreck any chance you have of gaining new, positive memories and moving on from the past. Waiting too long can make these things fester under the surface and catch you both by surprise later on.

You might be pleasantly surprised that by getting back together, you really have made some great changes in your own life. Your partner may have made some changes too. This may completely eliminate some of the problems you had in the past. However, you should realize that it does take a while for some people to change, and some people never will. It might take some doing on your part to simply get over problems you have with the issue, or find some other outlet for them. This truly is an individual case.

Another important part of getting back together is learning to do fun things again. Hopefully you have gone through old mementos and discovered amazing times you had together when you first started dating. Perhaps you should do some of the same things to encourage those good memories once again. It’s also a great idea to create new wonderful memories with one another! The more you do together, the happier you will be — as long as you’re not focusing on petty things and you feel incredibly blessed that you are back together once again.

I don’t want to paint an entirely rosy picture of getting back together. You might go through some trial and error as you adjust to your new relationship. Still, there is no reason not to believe that love can overcome all, and that your relationship will be amazing once again.

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